What?! Simpson Too Short for Bergdorf Bathroom
By MEG SWERTLOW
October 25, 2011
Jessica Simpson is having difficulties with potty training!
A big-bellied Jessica has been spotted out and about in NYC, She is currently in the Big Apple with sis Ashlee, nephew Bronx and mom Tina to work on a new tween denim line for the Jessica Simpson Collection. While there, the TMI-sharing singer/designer/pregnancy-denier deemed it appropriate to tweet a pic (from the knees down) of her legs dangling from the toilet in ultra luxe department store Bergdorf Goodman's bathroom. Apparently the tiny wonder was too short to reach the floor, so she captioned the twitpic as, "short girl problems."
Waaaaaaah! Could the big girl not reach the floor when she was making potty!? Ooooh No! (Bathroom tip: try not sitting so far back)
Ugh. Why must Jessica always give us information and images we just don’t need? First there was the ear candling twitpic of 2009; next there was Jessica chewing Ashlee’s hair twitpic incident of 2010 and now this! Jessica Simpson, I don't need to see pictures of you on a toilet (however small of an image you take!) Maybe I’m the product of a Midwestern Catholic mother, who, every time a scene in a movie took place in a bathroom, would yelp, "do we really need to see this?! This is disgusting!" Or maybe it’s because I find bathroom humor nauseating and frankly stupid. Please, celebrities, I implore you -- no bathroom photos! Keep your private time -- private! When looking at this pic, I have a lot of questions: First off, who took this photo? Why is this bathroom so big? Why is Jessica sitting so far back on the toilet? Why is there a body towel in the bathroom of a department store? Is that another toilet directly to the left of her? And finally, where are Jessica Simpson's shoes? No, but seriously, this is a public restroom -- where are her shoes!???
I wish I had the answers to those questions and also how long the belly-showing Jessica Simpson is going to keep mum around being an expectant mom, but alas I don't. Maybe I should get super sleuth Jessica Fletcher out of retirement for this head-scratcher?
And on another (very practical) note, from one short girl to another: I'm 5' 1" (According to imdb.com, Simpson is 5'31/2") and I've never had this foot-dangling problem. I've traveled from desolate villages of Nicaragua (it was n impulse move) to the cushy bathroom of Harrods and I've been just fine, thank you very much. All I can think is maybe Jessica is using the bathroom wrong? And given the outrageous things I've heard/read her say over the years, I think that's entirely possible.
-Do you think the pic is funny or TMI?