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Lindsay & Ali Lohan Think Dina Looks Scary
According to Wunderkinds Lindsay and Ali Lohan, their mom Dina is need of a major makeover. In fact, those dazzling human specimens think their cougar-tastic mom looks "scary." Yes, you heard it here folks, OldFace Lohan and Cadaver Lohan think their mother is scary. Well if this isn’t the pot calling the kettle black/scary -- I do not know what is.
At a Fashion Week event, 49-year-old Dina told Us Weekly, "My girls are always telling me to cut my hair," She continued, "You know, you think you're fashion forward, and then you have children who are way more, but you make your own look [work]. But it's hard when you're girls are like, 'Mom, you're looking scary.'"
Wait, are you kidding me?!? The creepo twins think Dina looks scary??! Out of the Holy Trinity of Lohan women, Dina actually looks the least terrifying. Let’s be honest, that’s like being crowned King of the Losers, so looking the best out of these haggard gals is clearly no great shakes. But it’s still something!
Lindsay, get real -- you are a 25 year-old-girl who has done so many illegal substances that you have the face of banshee and the teeth of Pennywise the Clown. At this point, your appearance is more wrecked than your career. And as for lil’ sis Ali, her face has changed so much and she lost so much weight that she looks like a dead person. The paparazzi pics that have surfaced of a freakishly pale, gaunt Ali walking through the streets of Beverly Hills make it look like she is a cadaver that broke out of the morgue and is on the prowl for designer brains.
Alls I am saying is -- take a look in the mirror, Lilo and just think about your own terrifying countenance before you tell your mom she is a scare bear. It’s time to get real with yourself: check out those rotted-out chiclets you call teeth (I know they were fixed but it took the wrath of every celeb blogger to get you to fix them – and honestly those images of your jacked-up teeth of aren’t leaving my head anytime soon) and your drug-addled face. Just some friendly advice someone who cares, who really, really cares!
BTW: While I am no champion of Dina Lohan -- I think she and Michael Lohan’s shoddy parenting are clearly the reason for both of their daughters being America’s Next Top Sh*tshow – I’ve gotta call out injustice out when I see it. I am like the Clarence Darrow of the gossip world – only blonder and more awkward.
P.S. Don’t you just love celebs? Is it because they are so fabulous and glamorous? Well, yes. But mostly ‘cause they say stupid sh*t.