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Say What? Joey Lawrence, Chippendales Stripper
Woaaaaaaah Joey, put your pants back on!
Because his acting career is going so swimmingly, Joey Lawrence has decided it's high-time to kick things up a notch by dropping his pants for the ladies. The Melissa & Joey actor is joining Las Vegas’ male erotic dancing troupe Chippendales for three weeks in June, where he will perform as a singer, dancer and host. Oh my! What would Blossom say!?
Joey will be joining the illustrious ranks of TV’s creepiest Bachelor ever, Jake Pavelka, and 98 Degrees’ internationally renowned superstar, Jeff Timmons, who have also shed trou for Chippendales. So ladies, get your Rav4 all gassed up, pull on your Pajama Jeans, strap on that fanny pack and grab your recently single aunt – it’s time to hit Sin City for a little fun!
So what was the father of two’s impetus for dancing around in a banana hammock? Lawrence told the Associated Press that after screening Channing Tatum's upcoming striptastic film Magic Mike, he was inspired to enlist in the male revue. Well that’s adorable. "Mommy, why is Daddy wearing a thong?" "Because honey, he has no other prospects when his show wrapped for summer hiatus."
Oh and Joey, you were inspired by a Channing Tatum movie? Cool, but maybe you should have just stepped up 2 the streets? Hey so, I watched an episode of the Client List last night. And I really liked it. Maybe after work I’ll use Jennifer Love Hewitt’s turn as a single mom/masseuse/sex worker to inspire me to go to the local Thai massage parlor, Wanna Phuket?, and give a few lonely gentleman some handies?! Sounds fun, right!? BTW: I am not going to do it for the money; getting paid in cheap thrills is enough for lil’ ole me.
According to AP, Lawrence also explained his reasoning for saying "yes" to stripping down for sex-starved and forgotten-about housewives who are making a last-ditch effort to recapture the fire in their loins: "I found out that guys like Brad Pitt and Javier Bardem have also done stuff like this and being the fearless guy that I am, I said yes."
Joey Lawrence, did you really say that? Did you really equate your career with those of Oscar winner Javier Bardem and four-time Oscar nominee Brad Pitt's?! Yes, yes you did. Jojo, may I remind you that you are the star of an ABC Family show, you were in a TV movie called My Fake Fiancé and when you placed third in Dancing with the Stars -- it was your greatest accolade of your career? You're not really on the same career trajectory as those heavy hitters.
Oh and just for those interested: I did some research on Brad Pitt and Javier Bardem’s stints as "strippers." Brad Pitt may have done some stripping in college (I found some vague info on one random site that said that), but most of the info led to Brad’s 2007 interview with People magazine, where he discussed that he had had a job in which he used to drive strippers to bachelor parties. So umm …not really a stripper at all. As for Javier Bardem – he says he only stripped once. The Spanish actor told Marie Claire in 2008, that he was had been a stripper, "For a day! It was a disaster. And you know who was there watching? My mum and my sister! It was kind of a thing - you go there and dance, they pay you some money. It wasn't like a Full Monty thing. I think I have a good relation with my family, thank God! We are very tight!" Let’s just say both of their careers as partially clothed shimmyshakers were short lived, if they even existed at all. So yeeeeeeeeah Joey, not really the same thing as being a family man and a working actor who chooses to do a stint at Chippendales.
Joeywoaaaaahy, it looks like whatever PR woman that told you that Javier and Brad were legit strippers pulled a fast one on you. You should probably get out your naughty cop outfit, handcuff her to a chair and get your grind on.
Love and banana hammocks,
If you wanna see Joey Lawrence let his freak flag fly, you can check out his package from June 7 - June 24 at the Rio Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas.